7:37 Local Time

I've found, in a discreet little corner of the hotel, a free internet access site, and I'm finally able to see my e-mail. There's nothing important in my inbox.

Anyway, the reef. I spent three days aboard the Anaconda III, a "mega yacht" which cruises around the Whitsunday Islands, near Mackay in Queensland. There was a large contingent of Scots on board, as well as some Irish, German, Canadian and Dutch travellers. Nerly all were Academic Career types, but we gelled quite quickly. Or captain, Max (as stereotypically a crusty old seadog as you could ever hope to meet) sailed, or rather smoked a lot and occaisonally turned a hilariously large wheel, to some islands and the Outer Reef.

I dived a total of five times off the ship, and let me tell you, nothing compares to this place. The diving is simply mind-blowing. All those aquarium fish youve seen, all those David Attenborugh programs you watched: It's like that, but you are actually experiencing it. Those parrotfish acutally swam past you. That stingray acutually just jetted off before your eyes. Yes, that is a turtle under that coral overhang, and he's giving you a look that says "Fuck off, I'm trying to sleep here, you bubble blowing, nitrogen intolerant, day-glo coloured retard." as you pat him on the head. There's just nothing else that compared to a dive here, truly and honestly.

I'm now on Hamilton island, which is like an upper-middle class version of the reef, for upper-middle class yuppies who don't want to deal with actually being in Australia and all the idosyncracies it has (such as being called a whinging pom, which all these upper-middle class yuppie morons are). Its a "safe", single-serving version of the area, and concequently, utterly boring and unforgivably dull. Still, it's as good a place as any to finish reading those novels you've meant to finish ages ago, and the Cockatoos that line up around you begging for tidbits provite no end of amusement. Untill they get bored with you and bugger off to beg at someone else.

Right, so that's me and my life until Friday, at which point I'll have and hour in Melborne and a long flight to Singapore. More later. Stay happy, all.